Rejection

Rejection sucks.  No matter what form in comes in, it’s a stinker!

I know rejection.  Debating whose been rejected more is subjective and pointless, and since this is my blog, I’ll whine if I want to!

I grew up a fat ass in a Mormon family who just wanted to tell jokes, get laid, and be friends with black people.  Of course, all of those things contradicted each other, and it came in the form of rejection.

On Halloween at the bar I commented on this guys costume.  I wasn’t attracted to him, nor was I flirting, but he was a stud in the “I’m wearing a costume to accentuates my ass, chest and muscular thighs” kind of way.  He looked at me, checked me up and down (I was in a fabulous Julia Child costume - pretty magical!), and then gave me a “Are you seriously talking to me?” look (I may have been reading into that).  But this man rejected me on a purely aesthetic level, and for that, I wanted to cut him.  But instead I did what I’ve been doing all of my life, I cracked a joke.  I said to the guy behind me in line who saw the rejection, “Oh, yes, I think I figured out his costume.  He came as a Douche Bag!  Witty!”

I’ve been feeling a lot of rejection lately: artistically, with men, dropped calls while using America’s largest 3G network on AT&T.  It has me depressed, I’m in such a funk.  Back in the day I would cope by eating many bowls of sugary cereals late at night while watching “The Golden Girls”.

But the adult Scott can’t do that!  So instead I’m going to set goals for myself, in which I will work on when rejections rears its ugly head.

1 - Researching unique facts about Presidents.  Did you know Herbert Hoover spoke fluent Chinese, and when he wanted to speak to his wife in private, they would do it in Chinese.

2 - Trying to find and locate one of the fugitives on America’s Top 10 Most Wanted list: http://www.fbi.gov/wanted/topten/fugitives/fugitives.htm

3 - Searching for antique Troll doll’s on Ebay: http://www.fbi.gov/wanted/topten/fugitives/fugitives.htm

4 - Trying to bend a spoon with the power of thought.

5 - Taking sexually suggestive pictures for Manhunt.com (but no nudes, only a clavicle, I have some class).

Guys, I really think this will work.  Goodbye funk, everything is going to be okay!